If I believed in a "previous life", I would have to say that it is likely I was a turtle. Even in the midst of plenty of good and positive things, I find myself more comfortable with the thought of retreating where I can tuck in all my vulnerable parts and ignore everything around me. Since I struggle deeply with loneliness, this only compounds the problem, but I genuinly have very little desire to do anything elese and simpy do so because I know I must-- life in my shell is warm and safe and no one can find reason to be upset with me--because I have done/said nothing upsetting-- I cant make waves from inside my shell-- I dont make a mess that I forget to deal with -- I cant overspend or share stupid ideas that make life unpleasant for the non-shell dwellers-- I may not come out today--